Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
just tell him i said nine months
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
