How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Randomize