Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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