All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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