i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
You were trust falling into bushes
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
