We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Randomize