guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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