Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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