Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Randomize
