just come out here and I will go home with you...
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
