Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
