The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize