What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Randomize