Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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