She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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