Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
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