I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
