WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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