You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
