So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize