one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
