so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
