Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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