My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
