drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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