literally had 100 drinks last night.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
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