I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
