there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
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We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
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Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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