It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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