Kiss
Puke
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
