remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
