How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
