Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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