I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
