still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize