So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
