Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize