You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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