im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
i would one night stand the shit outta him
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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