That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
it's great music for shaving your balls
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Randomize
