Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
