I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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