i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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