Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
