This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
