i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I just found puke in my bra..
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Randomize
