how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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