I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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