some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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