Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
