Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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